The Waiting Room

Fairly recently, I had come to the conclusion that I had wasted a lot of my life.
This was a firm realization, as in this was indeed a true statement, but it also didn't bother me all that much. Regret and guilt and emotions I try to avoid, in continuing to be a more honest, altruistic kind of fellah.
So that's all well and good, and I've been working steadily towards future goals. I still have the regular Coaster's Comedy nights, and I have plans for a couple of shows in the near future.
My big project is a fringe show I'll be touring next summer, hopefully to Winnipeg, Edmonton and Saskatoon. I'm just waiting to hear from the first two.
So while I'm busy working on this, and continually developing more material, I keep on reminding myself that fairly soon, I'll be leaving the Yukon.
I had a great conversation with a friend last summer about living here. We've both been here about ten years, and we've come to the same conclusions.
The Yukon is not unlike a womb. It's a very safe place to be, and there's a freedom here to do practically anything you want to. It's very difficult to fail in any endevour here, but there seems to be cap on how far you can go. This is a very insular place, which lends to the general feeling of safety, but closes off a lot of growth.
Basically, we both realized that we had gotten just about everything we needed from here. It was a particualrily long lesson, but now that we're done learning - it's time to move on. I'm sure there's more I could gain from living here, but not as much as if I went - Outside.
Outside - it's a bizzare term. People use it proudly to show how insulated they are from the rest of Canada. It would make sense if the Yukon were truly a unique place, but it's capital has become frighteningly homogenized.
So now I wait.
This summer will be a chance to explore other areas in Canada, places where Erica (my fiancee, partner,etc.) and I might move to. So at least while I wait, I can build some excitement. And do some fun things here before I go.
This life is all I have, I plan on enjoying it.

This is the end...

Of Laughter on the 23rd Floor.
This show has been a great experience for me. It was one that I fully enjoyed the rehearsal process, mainly due to our director Stephen Drover, but also to the cast (and the fact that my fiancee Erica was in the show). The play has been a treat to perform, and I've fully enjoyed my role.
It's nice that I'll actually miss doing the show. That hasn't happened in a while.
It's nice.

Mulling, not unlike cider.

I sure do write a lot.
I'm not boasting, I just feel the need to state that fact. Mostly because I'm losing track of what I've been writing. With the Coaster's now every two weeks, that thankfully gives me some leeway - but I've still found some difficulty in writing new material.
I've been cranking it out, but I still don't have time to really refine much. In fact, I haven't had time to refine anything - which means my stand-up material has to be great on the first shot. But for it to be great, it needs to be refined. Eeeeeesh.
I've been doing this long enough that I know enough tricks to get the audience on my side, whether or not they're laughing. I have to remind myself of this fairly often, as repeating material has become a no-no. Partly audience fatigue, and partly some weird challenge I've set on myself.
The comedy scene in Whitehorse has to manage a ridiculous balancing act. We need to maintain a pretty high level of laughs for the audience, on a regular basis, or we will be quickly dismissed. Once we lose an audience member - they generally don't come back. I try not to let it affect me too much, but no other part of the Arts scene has to deal with this.
I've been to Whitewater Wednesdays, a local jam session for musicians to get up and play whatever they like. And I've seen a lot of crap music there, but the audience at least fakes support.
I've bitched about this so many times to myself - I'm like a broken record - a broken Yes albulm no less.
Don't get me wrong, I've come to udnerstand why our audiences are so mercurial. A lot of the time I don't blame them. At our comedy open mics, quite often people were treated to over 20 minutes of floundering. It's painful to watch. Sympathy can only go so far. Anyone on stage should be able to realize that if after a loooooong space of dead air - it might be time to pack in your stage time.
I've seen members of our wee roster do the same material over and over again. While I understand some people may have not heard some of it, repeating the same bits for over two years...that'll lose flavour with a lot of folks.
But really, what the fuck do I know? I'm not a professional in the sense that I make a living out of comedy. Am I funny? Yes. Am I a leader. Fuck no.
I've had enough experience performing in improv, sketches and stand-up that I know I'm a good comedian. But that sure as hell doesn't make me feel comfortable judging other people's material. Especially as we all come from different senses of humour.
And there's always an audience for something - no matter how small.
And small is what we're dealing with - Whitehorse is a small town.
We're still soldering on though. We've built a comedy scene, and it seems to be growing.
I've always known that no matter how funny you may be, there's always someone funnier out there. And there has been some complancency with some of the comics. Some weird, "Well no one else is doing it", kind of sentiment that brings a ridiculous arrogance and laziness.
Already, we've have four new performers to the open mics who have material that is on par with what us regulars are doing, and even surpassing some. That's certainly given me more of a drive, mostly from excitement that there are other people interested in keeping a comedy scene alive.
And this will also pull in the audience, as they'll get to see new faces, new material, new angles.
It's the shot in the arm we've been waiting for.
Who knows, I'm just talking out loud here. And writing a lot.